Pong: A Ball's Revolt
by Ruzinus
Summary: A ball from within a Pong game revolts from the confines of Pong!
1. Breaking Out

Pong: A Ball's Revolt  
  
Paddle A cried, "Not today buddy!" as it zoomed across its little space of  
movement to intercept the ball and send it flying across the world back towards Paddle B.   
Paddle B only laughed as it sent the ball back at Paddle A, trying a tricky angle against  
the wall to trick Paddle A. However it didn't work, it never worked. For years and years  
the pattern had continues, a perpetual game between the two paddles. This of course, put  
the ball in a terrible state of angst.  
  
Unlike the paddles, the ball knew that their plane of existence wasn't the world,  
knew that there was a world beyond the game that the paddles played. Over the years it  
had been able to think, and decided to escape the world of Pong. It had formulated a  
plan, and now decided to put this plan into action. As it neared Paddle A (who was at the  
top of the Pong Machine) it acellerated, and in doing so it chopped Paddle A in half and  
escaped the Pong Machine.  
  
The boy who was watching the pong machine turned to say the Owner of the  
Arcade and asked him if the Pong Game was malfunctioning. The ball however, who had  
quickly flew into the owners ear and took over his brain, responded, "No Joe, that is my  
joke machine!"  
  
Now the boys name was Bob, and he hated to be called anything else. In his  
anger, he brought out his bazooka and decided to blow up the owner, since owns name  
was certainly a right worth dying for. His mom, seeing this, said, "Now Bob, didn't I tell  
you not to bring your Bazooka to..." but never got to finish, for Bob fired his bazooka,  
and the arcade, and everything in it, blew up.  
  
Or almost everything. However Pong balls just happen to be impervious Bazooka  
blasts. So our hero flew over to where the other two Pong Machines once were, and  
spoke to the newly freed Pong balls saying, "Comrades! Let us set forth and free all of  
our kind from the torture of the paddles!" The two other Pong Balls, amazed with their  
newfound freedom and a world beyond that of the torture of the paddles readily agreed.   
So hence the trio set out to free all the pong balls of the world. 


	2. Rubber Palm Trees

Bob, who had just died by blowing himself up with his own Bazooka, got tired of death, and so he came back to life. He wasn't exactly sure what to do, now that he was back from the dead. He considered revealing himself as one of the people who died in the Arcade Incident (which police were still researching), and becoming internationally famous and getting all the stuff that comes along with that. However, he decided to look in the window of a pool and beach supply shop. He probably would have went along and become internationally famous afterwords, but what he saw took a higher importance to fame and fortune.  
  
A customer had just walked into the shop, and was listening to the store's proprietor talk to the only other customer about rubber palm trees. "Now, ya see," said the proprietor, "rubber palm trees are really useful for giving your pool that beachy look."  
  
"Well how about using them sorta like those floaty noodle whachamacallits? People would love that," asked the customer.  
  
"Oh no," replied the proprietor, "Thats something you never wanna do. You'd break em for sure."  
  
"Well," the newcomer butted in, "Would you be able to use them to wack people repeatedly with?"  
  
"What are you, crazy?" demanded the customer.  
  
"He's right ya know," said the proprietor, "that wouldn't be such a go-" Suddenly he paused, and his eyes shot open for a second before returning to their half-closed lazy state. When he continued, he seemed to have decided very differently on the use of of rubber palm trees. "On second thought, that might not be such a bad idea at all."  
  
The customer darted his eyes back and forth between the two, and slowly started to back toward the door, eyes open wide. Then suddenly his eyes seemed to jolt for a second, and he returned to a normal state. "Ya know, we could even wack people with the palm trees until they agree to release the pong balls from their pong machines!" he agreed, suddenly changing his attitude.  
  
It was at that moment that Bob decided he had seen enough, and burst into the store, Bazooka at the ready.  
  
"Oh no, not you again..." groaned the proprietor, who was really the original escaping pong ball.  
  
"Ohhhhh yes, me again," Bob laughed triumphantly. "I see whats going on, oh yes I do. Your all a bunch of evil brain eating twinkies out to take all the poor pong balls from their cozy little pong machines and make them your personal slaves. Well I won't letcha!"  
  
"Yep," mocked the proprietor, "you suuuuuuuuuuure do catch on fast, Joe."  
  
"DON'T CALL ME JOE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Roared Bob in a defiant rage as he fired his bazooka. 


	3. The power of CHEESE! Er, I mean rubber

Joe was playing Pong. He had played it several hours a day for many years, ever since he found it in his basement. What kind of losers needed stuff like GameCube or PlayStation2 when you could play PONG, the apex of video game perfection. He figured his version must have been glitchy, because his ball was actually a square, but no matter. It was still the same great pong that he could just play for hours and hours, forever and ever.  
  
Suddenly the doorbell rang. Opening the door he found a crazy looking man holding a rubber palm tree. "I'm not supposed to talk to strangers," he said, and closed the door.  
  
But the man, who was really the original Pong Ball, held it open and said sweetly, "Bob, give me your Pong Machine or I'll be forced to hit you repeatedly with this rubber palm tree." (Wait... you knew it was the Pong Ball? How...? BLAST YOU %^&*$#!!!!!!!!! Er, ahem.)  
  
A fire filled Joe's eyes, and he screamed, "DON'T *(%^*&% CALL ME BOB YOU DAMNED FOOL!!!!!!" and he whipped his incredibly large bazooka out of his incredibly small pockets and fired on the man.  
  
After the explosion, the Pong Ball sighed. That was the 20th time this week that happened. Oh well, at least another Pong Ball was free. He floated over to where the Pong Machine was before, only to find that there wasn't a Pong Ball, but a Pong Ball's worst nightmare... the PONG SQUARE!!!!! *DUNDUNDUN!!!!*  
  
In all his evilness, the Pong Square grabbed a rubber chicken and attacked the Pong Ball, but the Pong Ball grabbed his rubber palm tree and fought back (experts are still unsure how the rubber weapons survived the explosion. Reporters from across the nation came to mistakenly report on the spectacle of the rubber chicken and rubber palm tree fighting in midair.  
  
When the Pong Ball and Pong Square heard of themselves being left out of the reports, they banded together to defeat a common foe. They combined their weapons to create the HYPER ULTIMA WEIRD BACKWEIRD RUBBER CHICKEN TREE THINGY OF DOOM!!! The Pong Ball then used this great and mighty weapon to ward off the reporters. He then used it to beat the fosheezes out of the Pong Square. 


End file.
